Fall, Pictures, Dinner, Sunset : S1 Loganfic
by elianna
Summary: A compilation of my stories based on the later events of season 1. Fall: What does Logan think about when he falls down? Pictures: Logan is disturbed by those pictures Lydecker sent him... Dinner: Max refuses Logan's dinner invitation. Again. Sunset: Loga
1. Introduction

Hi!  
I've decided that it would be smart to compile my small collection of stories from season one.  
  
There are a few things that I would like you to note, though.  
1. My writing ability seems to vary throughout the stories. So if you think I can't write from reading one story, please read another. I find that my style varies.  
  
2. I have a weird writing style. Some people have called it poetry. But I really don't know what it is. So if all you see is a bunch of short lines, its okay. It's supposed to be like that. Its' meant to be read with pauses, for effect. Or so I hope anyway...  
  
Well, good luck! I hope you enjoy my writing!  
  
Elianna (Mel) 


	2. Fall

----------------------------  
WRITER'S NOTE: This is my first real fanfic. So please be   
gentle. I hope my characterisation is realistic. I wrote this  
at 1:00 this morning and I think I let some of myself slip into  
Logan. Oops!  
Also, I know Logan is kinda talking (well, thinking) to himself  
in the first person (referring to himself as "Cale" and "you").   
I did that on purpose. I once read that creative/intelligent   
people talk to themselves.   
Hey, I even do it! ;)  
Feedback is greatly appreciated.  
----------------------------  
  
"Fall"  
By: elianna2000 (aka. Mel)  
  
----------------------------  
  
Oh, Fuck!  
Shit!  
Idiot!  
  
I run my hand over my face in frustration and try to get up.  
  
I hope Bling isn't nearby.   
The "last" thing I need is to be picked up like a baby and put   
gently down in my chair.   
Like I'm a fucking piece of china!  
  
I take a deep breath and try to relax.   
  
Maybe I should just lay down here for a while.   
I'm sure it couldn't hurt.  
  
I pause and crane my neck to look towards the door.   
  
Watch, Max will barge in any second now.   
Maybe I should get up, she can't see me like this.  
  
I prop myself up on my elbows.  
  
I try so hard not to look weak in front of her... so hard...   
And then something like this happens and I have to start from scratch!  
  
I start crawling for my wheelchair. It rolled across the room   
when I.... fell.  
  
I'm such an idiot...  
And I can't believe what I tried to do in that bar in Cape Haven...  
  
I shake my head in disgust as I travel (more like drag myself)   
towards my chair.  
  
What were you thinking, Cale?  
Did you actually think you could take on that guy?   
Probably.  
I seem to have fits of isanity. More and more so lately....  
  
I finally reach the foot of my chair. I'm kinda tiered, so   
I'll just rest here for a while.  
  
And then, like the 'All Powerful Eyes Only' that I am, I get   
flipped over by that "hick".  
  
I sigh loudly at that thought and brace myself for the mount.  
  
And then she comes to MY rescue.  
Jeez.  
I'm such a looser...  
  
I somehow manage to awkwardly boost myself up onto the seat.  
  
I don't think I can ever be her equal.   
I don't why I still bother to try.  
  
I readjust my body so that it's facing the front.  
  
And then you showed her your poem.  
  
I let a small, pathetic laugh escape my lungs and I shake my head.  
  
Now she has to think you're pathetic.  
What did you think that would accomplish?  
  
I fix my rumpled clothes and rub my face with both hands.  
  
Did you expect her to say, "Oh, golly gee Logan! It's absolutely   
the bestest best thing anyone's ever done for me! Thanks   
bunches!" and give you a hug and a peck on the cheek?  
  
I laugh again as I rearrange my legs and roll over to the bookshelf   
where I keep my notebook.  
  
She didn't really like it.   
You saw her face when she left.  
  
I sigh as I reach up and take down the book.  
  
'Curfew', my ass...  
Which one did you show her anyway?  
It was probably that stupid "somebody's angel" one.  
  
I flip through the pages of the book, looking for the dumb poem.  
  
God...  
What were you thinking?..  
  
I shake my head again.  
  
You should have shown her a generic one.  
Not one about her.  
She probably thinks you're some sensitive kind of guy now.  
So much for trying to impress her.  
Dad was right...  
  
I sigh in disgust at my patheticness.  
  
Some loner/computer geek/sensitive/crippled looser...   
Why do you keep setting yourself up like this?  
  
I reach the page where the poem should be....but isn't.   
The page has been torn off. I furrow my brow in thought.  
  
I didn't tear this.   
Did I?  
Bling wouldn't.....  
  
I slap the book shut with one hand and place it on my lap.  
  
It couldn't be Max.  
  
I shake my head slightly as I put the book back in its place.  
  
Well...   
It could be her.  
  
I start to roll over to my computer, confused.  
  
If it is...  
What does that mean?  
  
I hear a key unlocking the door and Max opens it. She's   
smiling. I smile back.  
  
"Hey," I manage.  
  
But I'm still thinking.  
  
What does that mean?  
  
THE END  
  
Feedback please!  
Send any comments to mwshrine@hotmail.com 


	3. Pictures

----------------  
WRITER'S NOTE:  
This fanfic is about those pictures that  
Lydecker sent Logan. In the show they   
bothered him and this story addresses   
that.  
Personally, I don't think that Logan   
would have been bothered by the pictures.  
But that's for the writers to decide.  
Not for little old me! :(  
----------------  
RATING: PG (for kissing...)  
  
SUMMARY: Logan is bothered by those   
pictures Lydecker sent him...  
  
SPOILERS: Itsy bitsy Pollo Loco and Camera  
ones. But it won't ruin the show!  
  
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything, just the   
text. Please don't sue cuz you'll just get my   
'85 Honda Accord. I refuse to part with my   
computer!  
----------------  
  
"Pictures"   
  
By elianna (aka Mel)  
  
----------------  
***********  
"I'm running. Running away from something.   
I don't know what. I just know that I've   
got to get away from here. Where is here?   
It looks like I'm in some woods. Its night.   
I've got to run faster.  
Wait a minute? Max? Is that you?  
She's walking towards me. Why? Why did I   
stop running?  
I can't move. I just stare at her eyes.  
They're so dark. So beautiful.  
I can feel her breath on my face now. She's so close.  
She licks her lips and closes her eyes.  
I can't believe this is happening...  
I tilt my head to the side and move in towards her.   
Slowly....  
She tastes so good. Like sugar...   
I move my hands into her hair and she does the same.  
God, why did I wait so long for this?  
Suddenly, she takes a firmer hold of my head.  
I feel her hands twist it sharply.  
I scream out in pain..."  
************  
  
I wake up with a shock. I look to my right and   
see the rain pouring down my window.  
  
It was just a dream.  
  
I rub my sticky forehead and try to catch my   
breath. I want to go back to sleep, but I can't.   
The image is still too clear in my mind.  
  
It was just a dream, Logan.  
Go back to sleep.  
They're only pictures.  
Get over it!  
  
But I know I won't. I sigh and struggle to get   
myself out of bed.  
  
There's no point in staying in bed if I can't sleep.  
  
Once in my chair, I rub my eyes with my palms   
and stifle a yawn.  
  
Maybe I can get some work done.  
  
I wheel myself over to the kitchen and pour   
myself some orange juice. I see the leftovers from   
last night's dinner and an image suddenly pops   
into my head.  
  
Stop thinking about her, Logan!  
You've got other things to do.  
  
I head to my office, but nothing can stop the   
flow of pictures in my mind. Max, in my doorway.   
Max, in that dress. Max, smiling at one of my   
jokes. Max, after our kiss... Max... as a child...   
with a trickle of blood from her mouth.  
  
Stop it!  
Stop it!  
STOP IT!  
  
I shake my head to try to clear my thoughts. Its   
no use. I arrive at my desk with a sigh.  
  
You've got to forget about it.  
Get to work!  
  
I check my e-mail, my phone messages... No leads,   
no new information. Nothing! I pound my desk with   
my fist in frustration.  
  
God, the one night I NEED to work, the world is alright.  
  
I sigh and stretch my arms out over my head. I cast   
a glance to my right. I regret it immediatly.  
  
Why didn't you put those away?  
What if Bling, or worse, Max had looked through there?  
  
I pick up the folder and roll over to my filing cabinet.  
  
Out of sight, out of mind.  
I hope so, anyway.  
Why are you letting this bother yourself so much?  
You know she would never hurt you?  
Lydecker just said those things to make you doubt her.  
But what if he's right?  
  
I start to open the drawer, but stop midway.  
  
Why not look one more time?  
See what you're so afraid of.  
  
I hesitantly place the folder on my lap and open it,   
slowly. I see the first picture. A young girl, clearly   
Max, staring away from the camera. A small trickle of   
blood coming from her mouth.  
  
She's so young.  
  
I continue to stare at the image, and a thought forms   
in my mind.  
  
She looks sad.  
Disturbed.  
Almost possessed.  
  
I flip to the next picture of all the kids.  
  
They all do.  
  
I return to the first picture, a small smile forms on   
my face.  
  
That's not the Max I know.  
She would never hurt you.  
She's saved your life God knows how many times!  
You know she's your friend.  
Why do you let this stuff bother you?  
  
I know the answer to that question. But I don't want   
to admit it to myself.  
  
My dreams betray me enough.   
I won't let myself be distracted any more than I have to.  
  
I roll over to the living room and stare out over the city.  
The rain has stopped. I smile. I'm content.  
  
I think I'll watch the sunrise.  
  
----------------  
Please send Feedback to mwshrine@hotmail.com . 


	4. Dinner

  
SUMMARY: Max refuses Logan's dinner invitation.   
What's he gonna do about it?  
  
SPOILERS: None whatsoever!  
  
RATING : G (few bad words)  
  
DISCLAIMER: They aren't mine. Please don't sue   
because all you'll get is my '85 Honda Accord.   
I refuse to part with my computer.  
  
WRITERS NOTE: The story takes place BEFORE "Meow"   
so it doesn't take into account the events that   
occured in that episode. However, I believe that   
this story explains why Logan reacted the way he  
did when Max cancelled their dinner. (I don't   
think that this is my best work, so if it isn't,   
tell me. But say something if its good too, k?) :)  
  
-----------------  
"Dinner" By elianna (aka Mel)  
-----------------  
  
She's looking out the window as usual.   
Her arms crossed nonchalantly over her chest.   
She just finished telling me something, but   
for the life of me I can't remember what it was.  
  
I look back at my computer screen, pretending   
to do something. I lick my lips before I summon   
up the courage to talk.  
  
"You buisy tonight?" I start.  
She turns and looks at me.  
I don't need to look at her.  
I can see her reflexion in the screen.  
  
I try not to sound too desperate. I swallow and   
continue.  
  
"Cuz I got my hands on some chicken and its got   
your name on it."  
  
The words spill out too quickly.  
Dammit!  
I don't want her to say no.  
  
She starts to walk towards the hall.  
And I know even before she mutters one of her   
lame excuses that my offer has been rejected.  
Again.  
  
I sigh as I hear the door close.  
  
Whether it be work, Manticore, friends, or even   
the police.  
She seems to have a reason not to spend more time   
than nessessary with me.  
  
She's not scared of me is she?  
  
I laugh out loud at that thought.  
  
HER, afraid of ME?  
Its just ridiculous!  
  
God knows I'm terrified of her.  
Not because she's a killer.  
No.  
I'm over that.  
  
She's just so sure of herself all the time.  
How can I compete with genetically engineered   
perfection?  
I can't.  
And she knows it.  
  
She used to stay.  
What was so different then?  
  
"You know the answer to that, Logan." My   
conscience whispers.  
  
You're right.  
I do.  
  
"What are you going to do about it?"  
  
The same thing I've been doing for the past   
few months.  
Pretend.  
Pretend it's nothing.  
Because it is.  
Nothing.  
  
I sense that my conscience has given up.   
Once again.  
  
Thank God.  
  
I pause, considering my last thought.  
  
What the hell are you talking about?  
It's not your conscience that gives up!  
It's you!  
It's always been you.  
  
You know you like her.  
Geez, you've wanted her since the day   
she first broke into your apartment.  
What warm-blooded male wouldn't?  
Those doe-like brow eyes...supple lips...  
her perfectly shaped body...  
  
I smile at the image forming in my head.   
In my mind, my dream-Max turns around and   
grins at me. She starts to walk towards me,   
slowly. Next thing I know she's on my lap.   
She leans into me and I feel her lower lip   
brush mine...  
  
STOP!  
  
I shake my head in an attempt to clear it.  
  
It's just wishful thinking.  
It probably won't come true.  
  
My dream-Max pouts and I smile.  
  
But then again, that doesn't mean I can't try.  
She did kiss you once, didn't she?  
She wouldn't have done it if she didn't   
feel SOMETHING.  
What have you got to loose, really?  
Your dignity is all but nonexistant.  
  
I roll back over to the window to think.  
  
It's almost been one year since you first met.  
Invite her over for an anniversary dinner.  
She can't refuse.   
And If she does?  
  
I scratch my beard.  
  
If she does, I guess I'll just let it go.  
No use wasting energy on a hopeless cause.  
  
I feel satisfied with my decision. Until   
my conscience decides to remind me, "Especially   
if that hopeless cause is you."   
I rub my face, sigh and return to my work.  
------------------  
Please send feedback to mwshrine@hotmail.com 


	5. Sunset

AUTHOR: Elianna  
TITLE: Sunset  
RATING: PG  
SPOILERS: ...And Jesus Brought a Casserole  
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything! Please don't  
sue 'cuz all you'll get is my '85 Honda Accord!  
I refuse to part with my computer!!!  
  
AUTHOR'S NOTES:  
I was very bothered by the thought that   
Logan didn't know Max was still alive.  
What would he do? What would he think?  
Poor Guy...  
This takes a shot at Logan's feelings  
and thoughts after Max's "death".  
P.S.: I inserted the song "Back For Good"  
by Take That because it kinda inspired me  
for this fic.  
************************************  
  
I guess now it's time for me to give up  
I feel it's time  
Got a picture of you beside me  
Got your lipstick mark still on your coffee cup  
Got a fist of pure emotion  
Got a head of shattered dreams  
Gotta leave it, gotta leave it all behind now  
  
-Back for Good (by Take That)  
  
************************************  
  
SUNSETBy: Elianna  
  
  
I can still remember the last thing she said to me face to face.  
"I'd kiss you, but it'd ruin my frame of mind."  
Or something like that anyway.  
God.  
  
I don't know how many times I've replayed that scene in my head.  
Sometimes I just grab her and kiss her madly... one last time.  
Sometimes I get on my knees and plead with her to stay.  
Sometimes I grab her and run far, far away.  
Sometimes... I just let her go...  
But that's not just a scene in my mind.  
I really did that.  
God I'm an idiot.  
  
I roll my chair away from the computer to the window. Where Bling  
can't see me. I squeeze my eyes shut and pinch the bridge of nose.   
I've got to keep away the tears. I raise my head to see my   
reflexion in the glass.  
  
You look so pathetic.  
What would Max say if she saw you like this?...  
  
I sigh and run my hands along my thighs.  
  
What's sad is that I honestly don't know the answer to that.  
I would never have let her see me like this.  
She would never have let me see her like this either.  
We had an unspoken agreement.  
That was the way things were.  
  
But I'm sure things would have changed if she...  
If she was still here.  
  
I feel a lump growing in my throught and I cough. Bling suddenly   
looks up from he was doing and asks if I'm okay. I manage to blurt   
out a meager reply.  
  
"Fine. Just tiered, that's all."  
  
He says something and I just nod my head. He'll leave me alone  
eventually.  
  
I want to be alone.  
I have to remember how to be alone.  
In some form or another, I've spent practically my whole life alone.  
Then she dropped in.  
Ever since, I've treasured her company.  
I spent a moment with her whenever I could.  
And then some days I tried to stay away.  
I was in denial.  
I was stupid.  
  
I run my hand along my face, smearing the tears over my cheeks.  
  
All that wasted time.  
Wasted doing stupid, selfish things.  
  
I turn my head slightly and see the exoskeleton box out of the  
corner of my eye.  
  
Like trying to walk.  
All the money.  
All the time.  
Wasted.  
And why?  
Because I thought she might look twice at me if I wasn't only   
half her size.  
Because I thought she saw me as less than a man.  
Jeez...  
  
I know I told myself that it was for moral reasons.  
So I could feel what it was to be normal again.  
But I am normal.  
I just did it for myself.  
But there's no point to it now.  
Why walk when I can't do it by her side?  
  
The past year has been the most complicated of my life.  
And the most wonderful.  
I'd do anything to have her back.  
Anything.  
But I have to move on.  
Eventually I'll be ready to.  
  
One day I won't dream of her in my arms.  
I won't wake up and think of her.  
I won't hear her beautiful laugh.  
I won't imagine that she's right behind me.  
I won't recall her deep brown eyes.  
I won't remember our last kiss.  
  
But when I see the sunset I'll remember it all.  
Because the sunset is hers.  
Now and forever in my heart.  
  
------------------------  
Feedback please! mwshrine@hotmail.com  
  
Do you like LoganFic? Visit my LoganFic archive @ http://www.geocities.com/loganfic 


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